thefight

O.k. so I went to the Dr. on Tuesday to have my IUD removed because I was having issues with it, then all of the sudden he is like ” we need to surgicaly remove it like now because it has perferated your uterine wall. WTF? So, I had surgery and proceeded to stress eat for days. I don’t even want to get on the scale and see how much I back slid. UGH! it is so frustrating that everytime I feel like I am getting somewhere my old friend comfort eating stabs mein the back again. So I am of the minset today that I just have to refocus my efforts and exercise more. I am having trouble exercising right now. Wish I had a walking buddy. Anyhoo… just an update. Oh yeah, and Sunday was my first mothers day and I ate horrible food, My efforts are futile against a big juicy steak.

I think I am losing weight. I would know if I could find my scale, but I go to the Dr. Tuesday so I will know then atleast. The big breakthrough for me was the realization that I am a comfort eater. I am doing soooooooo much better and I am thinking that I will lose everything I need to. It is a struggle everyday, I think about food way more than I should. I really hate that I have such an unhealthy relationship with food. Everyday I fight that old beast guilt, it makes me want to purge everytime I eat something that wasnt perfect. I am so all on or all off. I am working everyday at this, I wish it wasnt work for me. There is so much more to this journey of getting off the baby weight than just that, it is requiring allot more from me than I anticipated. Allot of introspection, allot of accountability. Allot of the hard stuff.